Dealing with grief over Christmas

For many, Christmas can be a difficult and bittersweet time when you're reminded of a loss of a loved one.

If this applies to you, the Irish Hospice Foundation has shared practical and compassionate tips for those who might be struggling to navigate grief this festive season.

Orla Keegan, Head of Bereavement, at the Irish Hospice Foundation, said: “Christmas is a time of year when the pain of loss can be particularly strong. It’s important to remember that there’s no right or wrong way to grieve. Support is always available – whether through family or friends. We encourage people to talk and the Irish Hospice Foundation is always here to provide guidance and support.”

Tips for coping with grief this Christmas:

·Plan ahead – acknowledge that Christmas will now be different and that while you may choose to keep some traditions, other may have to change or dropped altogether. Ask yourself which traditions are important to you and what you can reasonably cope with this year

· Keep things simple – Think about what is meaningful and realistic for you and discuss this with other family members. You might decide against an elaborate dinner or putting up decorations, for example

· Begin new traditions if you think it might help – some people begin traditions, such as visiting the grave on Christmas Eve, lighting a candle, or remembering the person in a toast

· Let the people around you know if you comfortable talking about the person who died – if you don’t mention their name, others may assume you don’t want them to mention it either

· Accept offers of help, both practical and emotional – those who love you just want to support you in whatever way they can. But you might also have to let them know what you need (e.g. walking the dog, minding the kids or putting the bins out)

· Plan some quiet time for yourself – grieving is tiring and energy sapping. When you can, lie down or take a short walk. If you accept invitations, give yourself the option of changing your mind or leaving early if you need to

· If there are children in the family, try to include them in the planning. Ask them for their ideas on how to spend the day. Young children may also need reassurance that Santa is still coming and to know that it’s ok to enjoy Christmas even if people are sad.

For more information and resources on coping with grief, see hospicefoundation.ie. The Irish Hospice Foundation's Bereavement Support Line is 1800-807077.